Showing posts with label self. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self. Show all posts
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
A Curious Self-Portrait
I'm in my third semester of my journey to become a counselor. One of my classes this semester is Creativity in Counseling, and I recently had an assignment to do a self portrait. It did not turn out at all how I expected. I did not have a plan in mind at all when I started, and it just flowed out. (Be kind, I am no artist.)
The central yin-yang is me, my balanced and centered and colorful self. The three circles connected to it are my children. The six circles outside of those represent my parents, my sister, my 2 closest friends, and an extra circle for a future friend I feel is coming. The ring of small circles surrounding those represent other family and friends. The ring of green triangles represent mountains and earth in general, and outside of those are representations of blue moons (also representing water) and yellow suns. Between the moon/sun combos are pawprints representing all of the animals in my life—past, present, and future. The outer edge represents fire. The earth and elements are important parts of my spirituality, I work in animal rescue, and family and friends are important to me. All are here. When looking at the photos of the finished product, I noticed it is slightly off-center. But so am I sometimes, and it IS a self portrait. ;) And interestingly, and a surprise to me, the entire thing became an eye. My eye. Can you see it?
While working on it, my mind went into a very meditative state. My work felt sacred and important, while also childlike and simple. Time fell away and music filled me and my hand took on a life of its own. I did not think. As you can see from the image, there were a lot of repetitive movements and colors, which I think helped take me into that meditative time-free state.
This took me more than one sitting to complete, and between sessions I wondered why my “self-portrait” had taken such a turn. It bothered me at first that my center self was not independent of the initial 3 circles, but now it makes sense. My children are still quite dependent on me, and if you look closely, the light blue circle (which I associate with my oldest) looks as though it is just starting to separate.
I recently came to a realization that despite rarely feeling lonely (I enjoy solitude!) I often feel deeply alone in life, being the sole support of three children with my family and friends scattered around the country. I’d never realized how much this aloneness weighed on me before. This activity showed me how far from alone I truly am; I have my children, my sister, my parents, my friends and other loved ones, my land, my spirituality, animals and the mountains and the sun and the moon and myself.
There is wisdom within us that is often imprisoned by language and only freed by creativity.
The central yin-yang is me, my balanced and centered and colorful self. The three circles connected to it are my children. The six circles outside of those represent my parents, my sister, my 2 closest friends, and an extra circle for a future friend I feel is coming. The ring of small circles surrounding those represent other family and friends. The ring of green triangles represent mountains and earth in general, and outside of those are representations of blue moons (also representing water) and yellow suns. Between the moon/sun combos are pawprints representing all of the animals in my life—past, present, and future. The outer edge represents fire. The earth and elements are important parts of my spirituality, I work in animal rescue, and family and friends are important to me. All are here. When looking at the photos of the finished product, I noticed it is slightly off-center. But so am I sometimes, and it IS a self portrait. ;) And interestingly, and a surprise to me, the entire thing became an eye. My eye. Can you see it?
While working on it, my mind went into a very meditative state. My work felt sacred and important, while also childlike and simple. Time fell away and music filled me and my hand took on a life of its own. I did not think. As you can see from the image, there were a lot of repetitive movements and colors, which I think helped take me into that meditative time-free state.
This took me more than one sitting to complete, and between sessions I wondered why my “self-portrait” had taken such a turn. It bothered me at first that my center self was not independent of the initial 3 circles, but now it makes sense. My children are still quite dependent on me, and if you look closely, the light blue circle (which I associate with my oldest) looks as though it is just starting to separate.
I recently came to a realization that despite rarely feeling lonely (I enjoy solitude!) I often feel deeply alone in life, being the sole support of three children with my family and friends scattered around the country. I’d never realized how much this aloneness weighed on me before. This activity showed me how far from alone I truly am; I have my children, my sister, my parents, my friends and other loved ones, my land, my spirituality, animals and the mountains and the sun and the moon and myself.
There is wisdom within us that is often imprisoned by language and only freed by creativity.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Guru Who?
You Have A Type B Personality |
 You're as laid back as they come... Your baseline mood is calm and level headed Creativity and philosophy are your forte Like a natural sedative, you have a soothing effect on people Friends and family often turn to you first with their problems You have the personality to be a spiritual or psychological guru |
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Monday, July 7, 2008
Gremlins
When I was 8, I fell in love with my sweet Gizmo gremlin stuffed animal, after seeing the movie in the theater.
Unfortunately, I vomited all over him on one of our annual summer nausea marathons (aka road trip) and he was not salvageable. My grandmother had seen how much I loved Gizmo while we were there visiting, so she sent me this replacement. (Brace yourself, Mom.)
He scared the crap out of me, but resulted in hours of fun for my dad, who used him to play practical jokes on my mom. Fun times.
No idea why this is all so vivid in my head right now, but I decided it was the universe telling me to blog.
Unfortunately, I vomited all over him on one of our annual summer nausea marathons (aka road trip) and he was not salvageable. My grandmother had seen how much I loved Gizmo while we were there visiting, so she sent me this replacement. (Brace yourself, Mom.)
He scared the crap out of me, but resulted in hours of fun for my dad, who used him to play practical jokes on my mom. Fun times.
No idea why this is all so vivid in my head right now, but I decided it was the universe telling me to blog.
Friday, July 4, 2008
Love & Hope
Laundromat time is prime reading time in our family and we always pass the time by reading stacks and stacks of books. Among many others, some of yesterday's reads included:
Yesterday while reading Moon and Otter and Frog, we came upon a section that talked about the existence of things we cannot see. I asked the kids, "What exists that we can't see? Can you think of anything?" Without missing a beat, Marian answered, "Love." And Leo simultaneously said, "Hope."
When asked yesterday if I was happy with my life, I responded with a resounding YES! I love my life and see way more positives than negatives. I'm very fulfilled with motherhood, homeschooling, pet fostering, my work, my school, my friends, my family, my community. I love my temperamental and crotchety home and car, my small town neighborhood, my stark valley. I'm putting down roots and spreading my wings and it is lovely.
(forgive the cellphone cam)
So. Are you happy?
.
Yesterday while reading Moon and Otter and Frog, we came upon a section that talked about the existence of things we cannot see. I asked the kids, "What exists that we can't see? Can you think of anything?" Without missing a beat, Marian answered, "Love." And Leo simultaneously said, "Hope."
When asked yesterday if I was happy with my life, I responded with a resounding YES! I love my life and see way more positives than negatives. I'm very fulfilled with motherhood, homeschooling, pet fostering, my work, my school, my friends, my family, my community. I love my temperamental and crotchety home and car, my small town neighborhood, my stark valley. I'm putting down roots and spreading my wings and it is lovely.
(forgive the cellphone cam)
So. Are you happy?
.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Caw.
The Raven
Wild, Solitary, Serious and Intellectual: you are the Raven! Raven is a strong symbol of both creation and destruction. Wisdom through intelligence, observation, and challenge. Raven is strongly tied to the spiritual world, living in a constant state of otherworldly awareness. Raven people tend to be very introspective and savor time spent ‘alone’.
